The Hole In My Chest Where Your Heart Used To Be
by HopeF0rTomorrow
Summary: Who knew there would ever be a situation where the end of the world would be a favourable outcome? (Welp... I'm sorry Connor) ONE-SHOT


The end was near, it always had been. They had just been blind to it. She didn't care. People were born dying. She had never thought of suffocating as the way to go. When she turned seventeen, she signed up for the army. Call it her inner patriot but it was death wish. That had been thirteen years ago and fives years since she had left. Connor made life _bearable_, in time he had made it joyous.

She felt terrible for wanting it to come faster. Connor was frantic. He had given up hope on escape but she was certain him panicking was not helping their finite air supply. Connor would essentially _burn_ to death. It would take longer, he'd watch her die. She didn't believe in God but she prayed that he'd spare him the pain.

"Connor, darling. I don't- I don't want you to suffer. It'll be painful." His eyes scanned the room, no exit. He wasn't expecting there to be one but it hurt to know that death was certain. They had approximately five minutes, less if he kept panicking. He recalled a song she loved, a song from years ago. She claimed she had heard it first as a child.

**_"_****_If the end of the world was near_**

**_Where would you choose to be?_**

**_If there was five more minutes of air_**

**_Would you panic and hide?_**

**_Or _****_r_****_un for your life?_**

**_Or stand here and spend them with me?_**

**_If we had five more minutes_**

**_Would I, could I_**

**_Make you happy?_****_"_**

"If we had five more minutes, could I make you happy?" He hadn't sang it, frankly he didn't have the will. He had whispered it so quietly she barely caught it.

"You remembered it? After all these years, you remembered _my_ favourite song?" She had been surprised. She doubted she'd remember things after a week nevermind three years.

"Will you see the end of the world with me?" She wanted to slap him, tell him that he wasn't allowed be the sad one. He wasn't meant to be the hopeless one.

"It will be my greatest regret, never getting to see you get married, you'd be a great mother." He was crying now. She never wanted him to cry. She had always loved him, every second of every day. She wanted to spill her whole heart into his ears. He didn't know how much she loved him, how she was engaged to a man she didn't love because _she's madly in love with her best friend._

His LED began cycling red. The panic was getting louder as his breaths got more ragged. She lay on the ground beside him. She thought about Hank. What he would see when they finally broke the door open. Would he see two best friends sharing their last embrace or his son and the woman who should have married him?

"I should have married you. I love _you_, Connor. Not David, never David. I pretended to love him because I could never have you." She lay her head on his arm, the side of her face pressed against his chest.

"I love you too, El." He buried his nose into her hair. She could feel pained pants gently stirring loose hairs from their position.

There was so much, so much they could do. If she blew her brains out maybe he'd have enough air to survive.

"Ella, if I forcefully stop my breathing program, there might be enough air-" He would die for her as she would for him.

"No. We'll die together or not at all. I can't imagine ever living with you." She felt him pull her closer as she buried her head in his jacket. She had only got him and she was going to lose him. He pulled away, looking into her eyes.

"I love you." She lay back on the cold concrete floor. Her fingers found his and they entwined. His fingertips massaged her as she closed her eyes. The silence was terrifying broken only by the sound of his hard breaths. She didn't dare open her eyes when his hand fell limp on top of hers and when the forceful pants were no more. This was it, this was where their story would _end_.

Ella let herself fall backwards into the black as she heard shouts and the opening of the door. She didn't want to feel, didn't want to stay here without _him_.

Hank cursed himself, cursed the Detroit traffic for delaying the teams. He shouldn't have let Ella and Connor go in alone. Ten minutes ago he could hear Connor frantically looking for loose panels in the walls and Ella trying to calm him. Moments ago the world went_ silent_.

Finally they managed to break the sealed doors open. Something about a system overwrite or some techno-babble like that. Hank was the first in the door as well as two human paramedics, technicians were yet to arrive.

Hank paused, dead in his tracks as he surveyed the stream before him. Connor and Ella were both lying on the floor, motionless. Connor's hand lay on top of Ella's. He instinctively ran to the female detective. His thoughts making him assume that Connor being the stronger would be ok. He leaned over Ella.

"Honey, c'mon darling. You're safe, we're going to get you safe. Just breathe for me, Ella." Her eyes opened in shock, wide blue eyes flickering like the light bulb in the far-east corner of the dim room.

"C-Con. P-please Hank. S-stay with him."

"No. Don't you worry about him. We'll get you looked at first. Then we'll worry about him." He squeezed her hand. He hushed her as tears began to stream down her face. Her eyes closed as she fought sleep.

"H-He _wasn't_ breathing. P-please, Hank. I love him." She released his hand as the two paramedics led her away on the gurney.

He wasn't breathing? Connor wasn't breathing. _Fuck_. Connor probably saved that girl. He leaned over the android. Gently he pressed his palm to his dear friend's cheek.

"Connor. Please son, we need you. Come back to us, come back to _me_." He pulled the detective onto his lap as he had all those years ago in the Stratford Tower. Connor had died in his arms but he had come back.

"Please Con. Goddamn it, breathe." He lay him back down on the floor making sure not to hurt his head. If he wanted to, Hank could trick himself into thinking Connor was just sleeping. He carefully undid his tie and the buttons of his dress shirt when a paramedic entered the room.

"Ella's asking for a Hank Anderson. She wants to know how Connor is." Her voice was monotone, lacking emotion even though she was human.

"I need you to help me, _please_. He's not breathing." He hated how desperate and broken he sounded.

"I'm not a technician. I have to take care of Ella. One will arrive shortly."

Fuck sake. If anyone had approached him five years ago and told him he'd try CPR on an android, he would have laughed. He went over the steps in his head, tilting Connor's head back.

He took a breath to compose himself before he placed his hands over Connor's chest, interlocking his fingers. He pushed down surprised by how human-like it was. He whispered "_Breathe_" repeatedly to the motionless form before him. He counted to thirty before restarting the process. After a few rounds, Hank felt something crack beneath his fingers. At this point, he was probably causing Connor more pain but damn him if they thought he was going to give up. He started the process again and again until he thought if he went any longer, he'd end up needing CPR himself.

Just as he thought it was all over, three technicians ran into the room. Swiftly taking over for Hank. One blonde held Connor's mouth open as a brunette woman shoved a sizeable tube down his throat. Hank clung to Connor's hand. He winced every time the kid was poked and prodded. It really wasn't to far from human medics. The tube now had a pump attached to the top, they were breathing for him.. Hank swallowed nervously to try and dislodge the lump in his throat.

The brunette woman stared at the male technician as he looked up and shook his head._ Nothing_. It took every fibre in Hank's body not to scream and furiously shake Connor. He wasn't supposed to do this, he wasn't going to do this. Not to him, who would he have? Ella? Ella had her own family to take care of. Hank felt the presence of the blonde's hand on his shoulder. There was no blood, no screams. Connor was just _gone_. His little LED had faded out for the last time. This was it.

"Wait! I have something." Hank's head shot up as the three started talking in some kind of medical jargon. Something about shock, overheating and the effects of being out for so long.

Connor's brown eyes shot open and he started to choke on the foreign object currently placed in his throat. His hand tightened into a skull-crushing grip as his hells dug into the concrete beneath. He coughed involuntarily. Violently, he trashed as he tried to assess what was currently happening. The male and blonde female technician pinned him down as Hank tried to calm him.

"Connor, stay still. You're going to hurt yourself." Connor's fingers tapped on Hank's open palm trying to spell something out as Hank's other hand swam through his hair.

"Blink once for no, twice for yes. You tryna spell out… where?" No.

"Ummm… Ella!?" Yes.

"She's okay. You're the one that was giving us trouble. You had me _scared_, fuckin' crying an' all. You'd laugh now thinking about it." Hank watched with one eye as the last of the tube exited Connor's mouth. Instantly, the overzealous detective tried to sit too fast, prompting to fall back against the concrete.

"No. Stay there. They have to check you over, ye big oaf." The technician motioned for him to sit as Hank guided his hand to Connor's back. Rubbing in circular motions, Connor's harsh breathes only increasing the tension.

"Calm, _son_. Breathe. What's your stress levels at?" He glanced over to see the LED on his right temple flashing red.

"E-Ella." His voice was rough like sandpaper.

"Alright, I'll bring you to see her. You need to take it easy." He supported Connor as he walked down the busy corridors and made it to the car.

"Ella… they said she hit her head pretty badly, she- can't remember anything. I'm sorry, Con." Hank glanced in the rear view window. The guilt in Connor's eyes was unmistakeable.

"It's probably for the best. Of course I don't want to see her in pain but some things that happened are better left unsaid."

Connor sat there every second for eight hours. Holding her hand gently as she roused. It had already been explained that she had almost no recollection of today's events.

"Connor? Why are you here? Why am I here?" Connor blinked rapidly, begging the tears to hold until he could excuse himself.

"We- _You_ got hurt. You struck your head with considerable force. You won't remember it.."

"I'm only back an' you wanna confuse me with big words. " She laughed before releasing her hand from his hold to rub at the ache in her head.

"David will be here soon." There was sorrow in his voice that she couldn't shake from her mind. She hadn't even asked for David. Maybe she had upset Connor?

"Connor… Something is wrong. What did I do?"

"Nothing. I just- I saw the end of the world.." Song lyrics. Her favourite song. Something had happened, something she didn't remember. She wanted to ask, wanted to make it better, wanted to take away the distress in her best friend's eyes. Sleep was calling, taking her hand and dancing with her. She would make it up to Connor in some way.

A single solitary tear made its way down Connor's face as he ran from the room, hand over his face in a sorry attempt to hide the tears flowing freely now. Ella wonders if she's _dying_. Why would Connor cry? The door swings on aged hinges. Usually Connor would carefully spend minutes inching the door closed as to not create any noise. The room is dimming and Ella prays that whatever she's done can be absolved.

Three months after the incident. Ella waits outside two big wooden doors. The two girls, one on either side of her, smile proudly. They look barely sixteen, opening these doors was probably a summer job. She flashes them an honest smile as they each take a handle.

"Connor… _Wow!_" She takes him in. Grey suit being exactly his style, accompanied with a baby blue tie. It somehow manages to make his eyes even move striking. She knows she's dancing with the devil but there's no way heaven would take her back. No way she could deny David what he deserves.

"Ella.. Don't be so silly, it's your big day. You look absolutely- _beautiful._" He knows it doesn't compare to her beauty but it's the closest he'll get. The white dress is embellished with the tiniest flowers. In her hair sits a veil, nestled between perfect curls. He knows this is wrong but he smiles for her, only for her. If this makes her happy, he'll do it.

"Thank you, for being my best friend and for doing this for me." She took his offered arm and walked towards the man who was soon to become her husband. Ella couldn't rid the horrible feeling, the feeling you get before you make a mistake. She wondered if they should be in opposite places. If the man on her arm should be the one she's approaching. Ella Luna Anderson sounds good, sounds _perfect_. Too bad she's made the worst mistake and in doing so, she's broke two perfectly good hearts.

As he watches his soulmate give her consent, he shatters. The "_I do_" whispered with the fakest smile he's seen in a while threatens to overthrow his emotions. Connor makes a mental note to record these new feelings later;

**Heartbroken ~**

_'suffering from overwhelming distress'_

**Pain ~**

_'Physical, mental or emotional distress'_

Who knew there could be a worse pain than nearly suffocating to death? Maybe seeing the end of the world would have been a favourable outcome?


End file.
